How to quit your job with an iPhone 3G

In ten easy steps:

  1. Purchase an ‘R’ rated movie from the iTunes music store.
  2. Pause movie during particularly noisy sex scene, preferably one involving farm animals.
  3. Turn off phone.
  4. Go to important meeting with your entire staff, including boss.
  5. Turn off ringer using mute switch and put phone to sleep.
  6. Think you’re safe.
  7. Innocently pull out headphones from jack, momentarily shorting out badly designed mechanism in jack used to sense the remote play switch.
  8. Remain blissfully unaware that you’ve just set a chain reaction in motion which will destroy your career.
  9. Sit in stunned horror a few seconds later as sounds of impure love eminate loudly from your shirtpocket in the middle of your boss’ presentation, despite the silent switch being on.
  10. Run back to office in tears to polish up resume.
  11. (Optional.) Write Steve Jobs an angry letter about how good design includes more than just polished metal.

(No, this didn’t happen to me. At least not exactly. It wasn’t a meeting, it was a seminar. And my boss wasn’t there, thankfully. And instead of farm animals, it was far worse: it was emo music.)

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